Above is a semi-accurate depiction of my 2015.
As you may remember, 2014 was a year that pulled me into its gaping maw, chewed me up with razor teeth, ingested me in ribbons, and shat me over a cliff.
That was fun. *nostalgic tear*
2015 was an absolutely bizarre year. It started out with you lot being the most wonderful human beings ever and saving me from a very, very bad situation and the Balrog that was 2014. It also started out with my agent leaving the business to pursue greener pastures, a frantic finishing of a novel, and a frenzied (successful) search for a new agent. It went on to some high ups (the Storm series taking off, thank you all verra mush) and some dismal downs (hard decisions, emotional turmoil, enough stress to make my hair fall out). To say 2015 was a roller coaster is putting it lightly.
I won’t go into the tough stuff, because it’s past and it can stay that way.
Among the good?
This self-employed thing is hard. Publishing in general is hard. There is a lot of uncertainty and a lot of…well. Wondering what the hell is words anyway.
I’m really thankful, going into 2016, that I took the risks I did in 2015. I guess if 2015 had a theme for me it was risk taking. I took some absolutely massive risks, both personally and professionally. It was scary as fuck. I have never in my life made myself more vulnerable in just about every possible understanding of that word. Quitting my day job after six years of 80-120 hour weeks, moving into a place by myself, putting my own work out there when other options didn’t work out — it took a lot to do that.
Neil Gaiman has blogged a few years in a row about his wishes for the new year each year. I like how that post ends, with a wish for us to be kinder to ourselves. To forgive ourselves and others. To allow ourselves to make mistakes.
I don’t want to make resolutions this year, really. I’m pretty healthy. I have a good work ethic. I want to keep up what I’ve been doing. For myself, I wish to continue to be true to myself, to express my feelings even when it’s scary, to keep taking risks even if I fail, and to keep building.
In general, I wish for more self-awareness. I want to know myself better. I think as humans, we’re all better when we ask ourselves not just what we’ve done but why we’ve done it, when we try to seek deep down into ourselves to discover what motivates us to make choices. I learned much of myself in 2015, and I hope to continue to learn more actively, to accept what I find in myself and work to improve myself with a thankful heart. If that sounds like drivel, that’s fine. You do you.
I wish for my stories to find readers. I want to go forward with boldness in the stories I tell. I’m working on one now that I am in love with and cannot wait to bring to you. You’ll also see EYE OF THE STORM this year, which should be up for preorder in the not-too-distant future. More news on that soon. I’m hoping also for continued partnership with Audible, who have done an extraordinary job with the Storm series and I hope to build on that relationship in the months and years to come. I hope to tell more stories this year and get to share others with you that are already written and looking for a home. I’ve loved the Shrike and Storm series both. I hope you’ll all come with me as I move onward. There are wealths of worlds inside my head, and I hope you’ll find a home in those as much as you’ve loved the Stormeworld and Gwen’s Edinburgh.
To everyone who bought or borrowed, read or listened, loved or hated my books this year, thank you for giving them a chance. I appreciate you more than you know.
I sincerely wish you all a lovely 2016. May you vanquish any monsters that appear, find solace in the cute and fuzzy, celebrate victories with hearty cries and high fives that make your hands sting, enjoy love so fierce that hugs hold you together and kisses that send you spiraling. I wish you warmth and joy. I wish you kindness, both to yourself and to others. I wish us all a more peaceful world where we listen and seek first to understand.
And hey, I wish you tacos. Because tacos are great.
Happy New Year, everyone!
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